Hello, hello!

I have had a nice day: it was good and bad and great and okay and all of that. Here are some thoughts from today I want to put down.

• I made a WhatsApp group full of some fav + some not-the-favouritest people which I use to to solve my can’t make a decision problem. Mostly for my what-to-eat and what-to-do troubles. Not my outfits tho. I like choosing my uniform of world domination myself. Anyhow, for tonight I couldn’t pick between staying up and doing a little writing and pre-reads for college vs sleeping early and doing it in the morning instead. Now, I’ve had a fun, chill, VERY FREE day today. So something in me wouldn’t allow me to do “practically nothing” through the day and just go to bed. I have always been like it but I think it’s a little too much. Need to break out of this headspace. Maybe it’s just me worried about I-don’t-have-much-time-outside-college-so-I-should-try-and-make-the-most-out-of-Sundays. If I had a friend doing this, I’d probably give them an earful, a warm earful of course. Practice what I’d preach?
• So, the WhatsApp group. They told me to sleep. But ONLY TODAY, have I passed against the final decision. Most days, I eat the McNuggets if they tell me to and go for a swim of they vote for it. So that.
• I read an essay called Same Wavelength by Isabel today. Here’s my favourite part: “Feeling unsafe puts you in your head: it forces you to analyse your surroundings, be constantly aware of how you are being perceived, to be in a state of seeking validation, acceptance, anything to soothe the unease. And that prevents you from existing naturally, vibing on your natural frequency—the way you do around people on the same wavelength as you!” I find myself feeling frustrated with being in my head a lot. In retrospect, I am indeed feeling insecure or out of place when that happens. Good thing I see the pattern now.
• Also, thinking about this thread by Visa today.
• Okay, I just yawned. If I don’t put some coffee in me (which I won’t because I love my eyes), I’ll be awake and trying to do something for the sake of it. And the smart kid in me knows better!
• Oh and reminder to self: Update webby!

Night,

AK!